I am so undeserving of the love that God has lavished on me. He saved me from so many things. I look at my family- broken homes, sin is rampant everywhere (with little care about what is right), lack of love and forgiveness, hurt, jealousy, and a multitude of other sins that break my heart. Yet God in His great mercy and grace chose me and saved me from this. I did not deserve it, nor do I deserve it today. But He has called me to be His child.
It is often easy to live in the "Bible Belt" (as I do now) and think that it is like that everywhere... A church on every corner, people are (for the most part) kind, God is something people talk about and believe in... the list could go on. But these past few days back home have renewed my thinking on grace and life and brought things back into perspective. I live in a fallen world where people are in desperate need of a Savior (even those who do not think they do).
Here is where it is hard- to show grace to others- especially my family. I am to be salt and light to them. I am so very different from them -that is the point I suppose- I am to be "in and not of the world". If I were like them, then I would be just as lost as they are. It is difficult because we do not value the same things. We do not enjoy talking about the same things. My very presence at times is just unwanted- yet I am to share the love and grace of God with them. Growing up this way has challenged me and strengthened my faith, but it has also made me very alone at times.
So, I often find myself wondering how to show this grace that I have received. Especially to those who do not want it or see a need for it- not just my family, but to all that I encounter.